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Posted 2002-09-17 by Tony Walsh

McDonald's is tainting upcoming The Sims Online with their so-called "food." Get this-- eating the food will increase your standing within the game. This, as we know, is actually the *opposite* of real life. If the Sims truly simulated reality, maybe players would get virtual bowel cancer. That'd be something.

In semi-related news, we'll all soon be eating cloned animal products. And why not-- we already eat genetically modified vegetables. Food is just some stuff we cram into our mouths anyway, who cares where it comes from. "They look like a pig. They smell like a pig. They feel like a pig," said a hog breeder in this story.

Thai frog said to be guarding puddle in the shape of Buddha's footprint. The solution to this problem? Rub its skin with talcum powder until it dies. []

Happy 10th anniversary Power Rangers! Too bad your real fans are now too old to appreciate you. Too bad that instead of watching your crappy new episodes airing in October, they're going to be recovering from hangovers, mowing the lawn, going to the supermarket, trashing their college dorms, or giving hand jobs in dark alleys.

I reorganized my Gallery in case anyone was interested in snooping.

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